Weekly Downs & Ups

This is the time of year that I dread the most: it's smackdown time. Those of you with older kids will know what I mean. The kids come back from Xmas break and suddenly realize that they are almost in high school (note to parents- this will happen again in 4 years). They suddenly begin to believe that they know everything, and therefore do not need guidance from anyone else. Normally, this occurs around the middle of Jan, but I've been lucky, and it hasn't gotten out of hand until now. This week, I was forced to return to the rules Nazi that you have to be at the beginning of the year. I actually held detention hall three times this week; a practice I have only been forced to implement once or twice in the last few months.

This strong and unyielding persona is not a comfortable fit for me, and I dread knowing that I'm going to have to put it on. Fortunately, these kids (most of them) are very mature in their "real-life" skills, and all but one of the real problems came to me yesterday and apologized for their behavior. We discussed it, and they all recognized that they had begun to take advantage of my forgiving nature. However, I have one student who is totally freaking out (this is the parochial-school girl). She talked with me after school, and was very upset because I'm not "nice" any more. I asked if she had noticed the extreme rudeness I had been receiving lately, and all she could see was that it hadn't come from her, so why should she be forced to live by the same rules? She honestly couldn't see that the same rules have to be implemented for everyone. {I have 3 rules: Respect yourself, Respect others, Respect your school}. Apparently, she should not have to fear getting a warning if she occasionally makes a mistake, because she is a straight-A student. She should not have to lose privelledges (we have a free day once a month if noone in the class receives a behavior warning), because others in her class misbehaved. I have explained over and over that if I see someone in the class trying to control the behavior, I do not hold the warning against the whole class, but thus far, I have not seen that happening in her class. My point is that I realize that you cannot control someone else's behavior, but if you say nothing, you are essentially saying that the behavior is acceptable. This is not a habit I want my kids to get into. She told me that "other people" are saying I am the social studies teacher's twin (she doesn't realize that I already knew that SHE had called me that, along with other bitchy, snyde remarks she has made...kids don't realize that a.) your friends will rat you out in a heartbeat b.) your voice carries to the ears of teachers standing six inches away from you, whether your comments were intended for those ears or not. and c.) your body language speaks louder than anything else.

Let me reassure you, I am not one of those teachers who NEEDS to be liked; honestly, I feel that I'm not doing my job if I'm liked all of the time. However, it does make the day easier if kids are excited about your class. I know that the only kids who will be permanently scarred by this are kids like her, whose parents never raise their voices or implement consequences (I only have about 4 out of about 110), but I don't know how much more clear I can make it: I will not be treated disrespectfully in my own class...end of story.

James was sick all week. He tried to come back on Thurs, but went back home before my class. I saw him in the hallway, and he looked miserable. We have 2 flus going around- it seems like as soon as someone gets over the really nasty 'cold, sore throat, fever' flu, they turn around and catch the stomach flu. I have a friend in the medical profession who will state that there is no such thing as "stomach flu"- most people who have those symptoms just have minor food poisoning. I don't care what you call it- it's being spread from person to person, and it's nasty. I personally went through almost 3 bottles of the pink stuff last weekend...blah.

I am very excited about a couple of things: first of all, I've been able to share my religious views with Bill, and he's been very interested. Those of you who are non-Christian will understand what I mean. I never discuss my religious beliefs with anyone I work with, because I know I will not be hired back if word gets out that I am Buddhist. Somehow, Bill (who is truly a tribute to the Christian faith) and I were talking this week, and I told him. I was afraid he would treat me differently (you know, the odd questions and then the distancing from you that happens). Last night, though, he and I talked for a couple of hours after school- we discussed the similarities in our beliefs, and he has asked if he can borrow a couple of books to read. Now, don't get me wrong, I do not want to "convert" him to my faith, nor do I think that his views COULD ever be swayed. I simply feel that he wants to understand more about the faith in an effort to feel closer to others around the world. My respect for him grows daily.

Also, we are about to begin my absolute favorite unit in class...ATMOSPHERE AND WEATHER!!! I know, it means little to you, but I am obsessed with these things, and LOVE teaching them!!!!! I adore everything that we do that has to do with earth science, but this is the best, closely followed by the Environmental Issues unit that I will do toward the end of the year.
I will put Physics in between, because I HATE it (Derek will understand). There is no sense in teaching physics to 8th graders- they are not intellectually ready for most of the concepts, and all it (along with algebra, which is also taught at this age) does is stress the kids out unnecessarily. When they get to high school and college, many of them will be phobic about these things because of their early experiences. I understand that certain kids are ready for these classes, and I think it's great to challenge students who are ready, but I dislike the pressure it puts on most of them. When we test, I will allow them to use their (handwritten) notes, and if they choose not to, they will receive extra credit. This allows students who are higher-level thinkers to be rewarded, and those who need some extra help to have it.

Ok, I'm not going to think physics right now, I'm looking for edible models of atmosphere (they love when we do edible models!!!)

Have a great week- and pray that I don't have to be such a hardass.

Anybody out there?

WHAT IS GOING ON???? I can't get my blog to load, just the background color. This post is an experiment to see if it will work- if not, it may be the weekend before I have time to fix the problem.

Important Stuff...PLEASE READ

I received the following letter and wanted to share it. These are extremely vital programs to all schools, not just inner-city ones. Please contact the appropriate officials ASAP.

Save Title IV Funds and Save the DARE Program

BACKGROUND
In his fiscal year 2006 budget request, President Bush recommended eliminateing the State Grants portion of the Saafe and Drug Free Schools and Communities (SDFSC) program despite the fact that it has historically served as the backbone of school based substance abuse prevention and intervention efforts in the United States and has had a significant impact on helping to achieve the 17% overall decline in youth drug use over the past three years.

If Congress implements this draconian cut, then the school based prevention infrastructures that are currently in place will be decimated and the 37 million youth who are served annually by programs funded throught SDFSC will no longer receive the prevention education they need.

Costs associated with drug, alcohol, and tobacco use add 10% or $41 billion to the already strained budgets of schools across the nation. the $441 million in funding for the SDFSC program is minimal when compared to these costs. We cannot afford to see the SDFSC program eliminated.

WHAT YOU CAN DO
Using CADCA's CapWiz system, fax the members of your congressional delegation. The members of the House and Senate will be submitting their top appropriations priorities to the Chairmen and Ranking Members of the Appropriations Subcommittees in the next several weeks. It is imperative that you flood your members with faxes to ensure that restoring the funding for this critical program is one of their top appropriations priorities. YOUR FAX WILL MAKE A DIFFERENCE! The more letters the Hill receives on this issue, the more likely we are to stop this program from being eliminated.

After you have faxed the members of your congressional delegation, send this alert to everyone else in your network.

TIMING
Fax the members of your congressional delegation immediately to ask them to make restoration of the funds for the SDFSC program one of their top priorities during the appropriations process. CADCA will continue to monitor the SDFSC program as the appropriations process moves forward and will alert you when further action must be taken.

CADCA's fax system allows you to automatically fax CADCA's sample letter on this issue to your legislators from CADCA's website. To send faxes to your legislators, go to http://www.capwiz.com/cadca

Then click on Elected Officials. Once that page pops up, move down toward the bottom of the page and type in the legislator's name.

If you would like to personalize your letter with examples from your community, please email jhembree@cadca.org for a MS Word version of the sample letter.

Ok, I had a hard time figuring out the website to send a message to the puppet who represents me, but it was definitely worth the time. PLEASE take the time to act on this- this isn't just political- there are thousands of lives at stake here...National Security begins when our kids are safe and drug-free.

Valentine's Day Massacre

You know, sometimes I feel like all I do is complain here. Actually, I had a great day until 6th hour. I took treats and valentines for the kids and they worked on their projects. Then came 6th hour...I got called into the AssPrincipal's office and called on the carpet. It seems that my team and one of the counselors (not GC, but one I've always liked) believe that I did not put up a united front with the team in the meeting with C's mom on Friday. Why? you ask, let me explain:

For starters, I was not seated correctly. I always sit behind the rest of them, and when C came in, he chose to sit with me. Apparently, I should have shoved him away and made him sit with his mom or another teacher.

Secondly, I did not speak up about the difficulties I've been having with him. Honestly, I couldn't have gotten a word in between his mom and Crusty, but I really didn't feel there was a need. Why? you ask again...because I have been in regular contact with his mom. Every time we had a problem, I've called her, so she is well aware of the situation. If his other teachers chose not to do this (in spite of repeated requests by mom to do so), that's their problem.

Finally, I mentioned to his mom that some of our students have switched to other teams when they had problems with individual teachers.

The Ass kept me in his office for 20 minutes while he told me that I am (get this) TOO COMPASSIONATE, and need to stop sticking up for the kids. Apparently, I am supposed to sit by and watch these vicious bitches railroad my kids out of our classes because they are more difficult. I told him that I appreciated his advice. I then told him that I felt that I had presented a very united front while C and his mom were there, but that under no circumstances would I keep my mouth shut while I observed his being treated unfairly. He backpedalled and said that of course I should stand up for the kids, but only in private. Again, I asked what exactly I had done to make my team and the counselor feel that I was not standing with them. Again, he mentioned the way we were seated, and the fact that I did not bring up my problems with C. So, basically, I wasted 20 minutes of my life listening to a man that I don't respect or like tell me to be someone that I am not... That's 20 minutes I'll never get back. As far as I'm concerned, I KNOW I am doing a good job. I KNOW Crusty will not be asked back next year (another story, but she was rude to the superintendent's wife- oops). I KNOW the principal likes and respects me. I KNOW my kids like and respect me. I KNOW my kids' parents like and respect me. I KNOW that the staff whom I respect feel the same about me. I only have 3 months left; my team can just KISS MY ENTIRE WHITE ASS.

Happy Heart Day

Valentine's Dance last night, followed by teachers night out...Tsarina is hurting today. The DJ didn't show up for the dance, so one of the teachers got her computer and another DJ'd- funny thing is that the music was much better than what the "professional" DJ played at the last dance. I got stuck at the coat check for an hour (*note to self- never agree to help out for "a couple of minutes"*) It's so strange to see the kids looking so grown up; the girls were all in formal wear, and the guys all looked like rappers. Two of my kids, Carl and Shay, were fixed up- she asked me about him in class, because they didn't know each other. I had really high hopes for this, as they're both really great kids (actually, he's a cutie, and I know his dad is single- been trying to get him in all year ;) I never even saw them talking to each other...*sigh* the drama of 8th grade dances! BTW, I don't think that there has ever been a hotter song than Candy Shop by 50 Cent--- all I can say is, "DAMN"! It's like sex in CD form.

C is suspended, and his mom is talking about home-schooling him. It seems Mom is sick and tired of Crusty writing him referrals. If I liked Crusty, I would almost have felt bad for her as his mom ripped her a new one. I was very pleased that his mom stood up for him the way she did; many parents meet Crusty, and she's sooooo calm and collected that they assume she's right and their kids are wrong. I'm glad his mom saw through the phony facade. Oh, the reason for C's recent outbursts? It seems that his sister died 2 years ago this past week, and his mom said that the last time he had seen her was at Christmas. She said they were very close, and that he always has problems between Xmas and now. When I told the other teachers that, Crusty said, "I know, he wrote about it in his journal"...well, then, when I was going crazy trying to figure out what was wrong, why the fuck didn't she say something? I'll tell you why...she hates the fact that he likes my class more than hers and is usually good for me. Normally, when I know that a student has found a teacher that they connect with, I'm really happy about it. However, there are many teachers who feel threatened and jealous of that. It's unfortunate that these kids, who are trying to learn how to be adults, are learning from people like that...bitch. I know he requires a lot of attention, but I really miss C when he's not in class.

We're putting the bug in our principal's ear about the team we want next year- all teachers who are like myself- they ENJOY the more challenging students. We've been talking to him about giving us small classes of the "hardcore" kids and letting us see what we can do. Honestly, I think that this would be an amazing group; I respect and like all of them, and while we don't always agree, we respect each other enough to listen. They were all in the group that went out last night- geez, it was fun! I'd like to move down there so that I could actually do something once in a while...well, I guess I should wait and see if I'm offered a job for next year before I get my hopes up too much.

I'm going to go plan for the week (and take plenty of Tylenol and juice). I hope you all have a great Valentine's Day...get lucky once for me!

Hello

James is back. He's come in at lunch the past two days to work on make-up work. He came in after basketball practice tonight, and had to work on math. God, I recognize that frustration- and sadly, I can't really help him; I am so severely math-phobic. I tried to explain that every subject has its own language, and if he didn't understand, it just meant that noone had explained the language to him. I may have him convinced to go see the math teacher for tutoring- I hope. He also shared some information about the abuse he suffered as a child, before they came to live with his grandma. I wanted to be sick. He does have a pretty big scar from his eye into his temple, and I've always wondered where it came from- I guess now I know. I realize most of you have never seen him, but he's such a cute kid- big dark eyes and a mischevious smile...how could anyone, especially his mom, hurt him like that?????? I believe there are certain crimes that are unforgivable- child abuse is one of them. I did find out that his dad is living in town now. He picked James up tonight. I know it's not the Cleaver family, but having his dad around is a step up from a lot of kids, and I'm grateful for that.

I gave all of the kids Mardi Gras beads yesterday (thanks for the idea, Robyn)- they loved them, and it was a really fun day! Many of them were still wearing the beads today.

Ok, I've been battling some stupid virus forever, and I'm exhausted and going to bed. Have a beautiful day all!

The World According to Tsarina

The other day, one of my students was complaining about something, and suggesting that someone should fix the problem. This is one of my biggest pet peeves- people who complain and complain without offering any solutions. Before I could spit out one of my favorite cliches (which I do have on both poster and Tshirt), half the class said it to him! The shouted, "Be the change you wish to see in the world" (Gandhi). I was so proud that my love of motivational quotes is soaking in! It seems to me that many of my favorite phrases come from posters I have bought for my room. These are just a few of them:

"Where you come from does not determine where you can go"
"No matter how far you have travelled down the wrong road...you can always turn back"
"Your actions speak louder than words"
"A little respect goes a long way"
"I choose to be happy"
"Without education, you are not going anywhere in this world"- Malcolm X

I throw these pearls of wisdom at them daily, in the hopes that some of them will stick with the kids- I'm glad to know that one of my favorites is beginning to.

I've only talked to my mom once in the past two weeks. She must be sulking because I haven't called, but honestly, I feel better when I don't have to hear her complaining about how unfairly she's being treated by everyone and everything. I also get sick of the racist implications she slides in- now, she's not as bad as dad, but she honestly believes that my kids are so far behind because of the color of their skin. Truthfully, I don't want to try to explain to her any more; she just doesn't get it. It makes me sad that they live their lives in such ignorance, and completely unaware of it. She is just another person who is an energy vampire- she will suck the positive energy from you, and then convert it to negative. If you try to point out to her that she always looks on the dark side, she goes into the 6 year-old chant; "Well, I'm sorry I'm not perfect. I guess if nobody likes me, I'll just leave you alone". It's exhausting. Now that Grandma is gone, I wish my parents would move to Arizona with everyone else (sorry, Arizona). But, dad will never leave- he hates change. Often, I just look at them and wonder how I came from that environment. I guess I should just be glad that I was able to avoid spending my life in that mindset, and continue to pray that they somehow get out of it.

James will be back in school tomorrow. Bill has suggested that I take control of helping him make up his work, and he will make sure he gets home. The math teacher was pissed because she saw James in the stands at the playoff game (he wasn't supposed to be there because he's suspended), and she said he was flirting with a girl instead of watching the game... Has this woman never seen a 15 year-old boy before? Derek- correct me if I'm wrong, but don't most 15 year-olds like to flirt with pretty girls? I mean, seriously, she was going to complain in the office- she said that if he'd been there to watch the game, she wouldn't say anything, but since he wasn't paying attention, she would. I tried to explain that he's been suspended, so he hasn't seen a lot of the kids for several days, and besides, he has the hormones of a normal teenager. She's a very rigid person, but agreed to not complain. The other teachers are going to keep me updated on James' progress...it seems that he hasn't been turning in everything in Lit and Grammar. I think I'm just going to make him stay after one or two days a week, and we'll work on study habits. I'm also starting a computer skills workshop after school on Mondays to help the kids who need it- you can't believe how many have absolutely NO abilities. Then there's scholastic bowl T-Th, so I may have to start missing one practice a week to help James. I sometimes wish there was one more day in the week.

Ok, I should go get grades recorded. I wish you all peace.

Smackdown

To Inanna and all of the other parents who are forced to battle the schools to ensure their children are being educated and treated fairly- my hat is off to you. I feel that over the past two days, I have walked a mile in your shoes, and I can't imagine doing it longer. James has been suspended for 3 days. The offense was minor (horseplay in the hallway), and there is no justification for it. I went last night and spoke with the Ass principal (whose mind was totally on catching a flight to a conference). He said James has had four office referrals this year...REALLY I ask- but he hasn't been in APR (in-school suspension). No, the referrals were for missed detentions (pretty serious, eh?) The detentions, you ask? Because he was tardy (if they miss the bus, they have to call a relative for a ride, as they live with Grandma who doesn't have a car of her own). However, he did seem obsessed with an incident involving James last year, where James was swearing at him and was suspended for 10 days. I tried to point out that he has turned his life around this year, but Ass was not convinced.

This morning, I brought my concern to the Dean (I love her- she's a peer to the Ass, not his superior). She looked through the file, and agreed with me. She emailed the principal and arranged a meeting with him to discuss it. The good counselor (I guess I'll call him GC) went, too to speak on James' behalf. The principal agreed with the assessment, but does not have the authority to overturn Ass' decision once made. Often, if a parent will come in and plead their case, the child will be allowed to return early. I asked if I could speak in that capacity, as James has asked me to fill in at several functions as such. I was told that since Ass did not allow this in his documentation, nothing can be done. I know I did all that I could, but I still feel that I failed. James missed a huge game last night, and playoffs tonight. I don't think he can be back on the team after being suspended. I did bring up my concern with the principal that I have sent several white students to the Ass with the same type of incident, who had similar numbers of office referrals for more disruptive things than James, and they were given DETENTIONS. I don't give a flying fuck if Ass is pissed when he gets back. I have bit my tongue on four occasions that I felt that black students were being treated unfairly, but I WILL NOT sit back quietly while he fucks with James. I don't care if I have to bring Jesse Jackson back- I'm not going to let this go.

C behaved like an idiot today and gave me no choice but to send him down on an office referral. I don't know what was running through his mind, but he had a choice to return and do his work, or go to the office and take the referral, and he chose the latter. I did go ask that he be put in APR instead of suspended- that way he'll get some work done. I sometimes feel like he drains the life force out of me. He's so desperately needy- I know he really likes me, and I feel like I'm being tested to see if I'll follow through with consequences. I took him into GC and explained that the referral was HIS choice- he made it, and he would receive the consequences. GC did make an interesting observation- C has only acted like this since Xmas break. I remembered the day that they came back, he came up and hugged me, and he had tears in his eyes. He said he had missed me very much. A lot of our kids are used to being abandoned by adults, and they resent when they grow to depend on one too much... OR, my co-workers are right and "he's just a jerk who'll end up in prison like his dad". (Dad and uncle are in prison for murder since C was 3). Whatever, I'll go see him in APR tomorrow- several of my angels are in there, and I'm going to take a quiz down for them (hehehe- they think they'll have extra time to prepare and won't have to take it until they get back)!!!

Ok, I've got several things to take care of before I go to bed, so I wish you all a peaceful day.